Learning to Say Goodbye

“Goodbye, farewell, to you my friend…”  You know when you make a departure with someone and that song automatically pops into your head?  Probably not but oh well.  When I think of goodbye’s, most times I think about see-you-latters because that’s what we are programmed to think right?  Well, I guess that’s only in certain circumstances.

Some goodbyes were meant to be bittersweet.  Ex-lovers for example. I’ve never had guys falling for me, that’s ridiculous.  It’s not impossible but for the most part it’s pretty ridiculous.  But that’s besides the point.  Recently, I had to let go of someone that I grew to … Appreciate?  Appreciate sounds too small for what I felt for this person.  I’d say somewhere between appreciate and love.  I grew accustomed to knowing that he would be there for me at the end of a horrible day.  But then the big kicker came in and what do ya know, he has a girlfriend.  At that moment, I decided to cut all ties to him because if I were being honest with myself, I’d say that it hurt like hell.  For me, I talked to him hoping that maybe we would grow into something so much more than a complicated friendship.  Unfortunately for him, it was the opposite.

I told a friend about the situation and she couldn’t grasp the reason for me totally blocking him out of my life.  “But can’t you just be friends with him?” she asked.  Truth is, yes, I could have but I didn’t want to.  I didn’t want to spend our friendship pining over him.  So I had to say goodbye.  In a way, it works out for both of us…

My whole life, I tried so hard not to say unnecessary goodbyes. If a goodbye ever came up, I would shy away and disappear.  But in the situation with the guy, I had to learn that some goodbye’s are necessary.  Even if you don’t want them to be, it’s needed.

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