Learning to Say Goodbye

“Goodbye, farewell, to you my friend…”  You know when you make a departure with someone and that song automatically pops into your head?  Probably not but oh well.  When I think of goodbye’s, most times I think about see-you-latters because that’s what we are programmed to think right?  Well, I guess that’s only in certain circumstances.

Some goodbyes were meant to be bittersweet.  Ex-lovers for example. I’ve never had guys falling for me, that’s ridiculous.  It’s not impossible but for the most part it’s pretty ridiculous.  But that’s besides the point.  Recently, I had to let go of someone that I grew to … Appreciate?  Appreciate sounds too small for what I felt for this person.  I’d say somewhere between appreciate and love.  I grew accustomed to knowing that he would be there for me at the end of a horrible day.  But then the big kicker came in and what do ya know, he has a girlfriend.  At that moment, I decided to cut all ties to him because if I were being honest with myself, I’d say that it hurt like hell.  For me, I talked to him hoping that maybe we would grow into something so much more than a complicated friendship.  Unfortunately for him, it was the opposite.

I told a friend about the situation and she couldn’t grasp the reason for me totally blocking him out of my life.  “But can’t you just be friends with him?” she asked.  Truth is, yes, I could have but I didn’t want to.  I didn’t want to spend our friendship pining over him.  So I had to say goodbye.  In a way, it works out for both of us…

My whole life, I tried so hard not to say unnecessary goodbyes. If a goodbye ever came up, I would shy away and disappear.  But in the situation with the guy, I had to learn that some goodbye’s are necessary.  Even if you don’t want them to be, it’s needed.


Genuine Happiness

What does it mean to be genuinely happy?

Truly, genuinely, earth shattering, happiness.  The kind of happiness that leaves you on a natural high for weeks.  The kind of happiness that when feeling down, you know you can recall on that happiness to get you through.

It seems like everyone my age is so focused on their future careers and making that “breakthrough money”, it surprises me.  Don’t get me wrong, it’s a great thing that they’re so intent on creating their futures.  In fact, it’s expected: graduate high school,  go to college, (hopefully) graduate college, and last but not least, find that career job that you’ve been working so hard for.  Most follow this course, others however (like me), end up … Lost?

Lost doesn’t exactly seem like the right word but for the moment, it’s all that I can think of.  Anyways, the main point is that, where is the fun?  Where is the happiness?  We’re so pent up on fulfilling our expectations of ourselves, and others of us, that we forget to truly enjoy our life.  If there’s anything I’ve learned from my being lost, it’s that I can truly say I’m happy.  Sure, I’m not doing what I wanted to do when I got out of high school but I am happy.

Happiness means different things for many people.  To some, it might be that stellar career and luxury. But to me, it’s the fact that we can wake up to a new and exciting day.  It’s the fact that there is life all around me, and it is beautiful.

Whatever your definition of happiness is, chase it.  Because lets face it, life’s too good to be focusing on the sad things in life.